-----Original Message-----
FROM: Philip J Scott
SENT: Apr 1 2004 5:15AM
SUBJECT:your intrusion
We played this one on our CEO, the Reverend Tyrese Abdul Mohammed. (CLICK FOR PICTURE)
I know it's very similar to the other one we played but still good because it was a genuine e-mail that came from a concerned father.
here is the original mail that came in to Monkey:
I am writing to you today to complain to you about your lack of common
sense. My youngest son(8 years old) was doing a project for school obout
optical illusion. He searched on google and went to a couple of web sites
and then found a good one.
he then searched through the various illusions, only to find the one with
the black rotating circles, yes you know the one, it says look closely and
then wham, out pops your hideous Ferret. This had the effect of scaring him
s**tless. It took us quite a while to calm him down and he woke in the night
several times crying. As you can imagine this has had a profound effect on
him and is now very traumatised. It is going to take him a while to get over
this, and has already said he will not look for anything in the net again,
as he is now in fear that this may happen again. I am all in favour of
keeping the net as it is and for people to be able to express themselves,
but this is unacceptable. I look forward to your reply and a satisfactory
conclusion. Regards P J Scott.
-----Original Message-----
FROM: The Monkey
SENT: Apr 1 2004 10:29AM
SUBJECT:FW: your intrusion
Monkey passes the torch:
Helga, please take this one. I just don't think that I have the
sarcastic talents that are required for such an email.
Enjoy
-----Original Message-----
FROM: Tyrese Abdul Mohammed
SENT: Apr 1 2004 10:52AM
SUBJECT:RE: your intrusion
Tyrese's interception:
Monkey,
Have you lost your mind, asking helga to respond sarcastically. Helga,
have pity on this young parent that is only thinking of his child.
Please, no lawsuits or slippy having to send a follow up apology letter.
-----Original Message-----
FROM: Helga The Help
SENT: Apr 1 2004 1:27PM
SUBJECT:RE: your intrusion
Finally, after much argument about how best to play this, I compose the following. It was never actually sent to poor PJ (just made to seem like it was) and just the nature of the response should have given away the fact that this is a joke.
Tyrese was pissed all day. He finally called Slippy saying that he was putting together a memo on e-mail reply policy when Slippy gave the joke away.
Dear Philip,
Thanks for writing in. I understand that you're looking for a conclusion.
How about this one:
You are a f*****g faggot!
What kind of parent turns an 8-year-old loose on the Internet? "Oh, he's
doing a project on illusions. All of his search results will therefore be
M.C. Escher and David Copperfield and furry disappearing bunnies."
You really f****d up you moronic attention-starved a**-rapist. You're lucky
we don't call DCFS and then sue your a** for YOUR INTRUSION.
As for your kid, I'm sure he's sufficiently f****d up by having a papa who
sticks his [You know what...and where]. Do the kid and the rest of the world a favor:
hang yourself from the nearest bridge.
Love,
Helga