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Sep 27 2003 12:00AM

-----Original Message-----
FROM: Helga The Help
SENT: Sep 27 2003 12:00AM
SUBJECT:Evolution Newsletter


On your knees! It's Helga The Help.

Last week Monkey showed us his true colors. He sponsored a child in Sri Lanka.

Now how is it that otherwise intelligent people keep falling for this scam? Let's assume for a second that out of the 20 dollars you pay every month, 10% ends up actually doing this girl good instead of lining the pockets of the TV evangelist.

Who the hell do you people think you are interfering with one of evolution's cardinal rules? "Survival of the Fittest" is not just a rule it's an entire philosophy - and a very correct one. If a creature is too frail to reach reproductive age then IT DOES NOT DESERVE TO REPRODUCE!!!

We in America have all but defeated evolution. Modern medicine can keep alive newborns with MS, Spina Bifida, Downs Syndrome, HIV, webbed feet and peanut allergies. In doing so we secure the likelihood that they will pass on their defective DNA to their own demonic offspring.

Whom are we kidding?

The world should wake up and smell the Galapagos. Procreation has always been the privilege of the strong. As we continue to thin our genetic makeup the third world is breeding our doom.

Fellow youth! I call you to arms! Let's burn our insulin, kill our psychoanalysts and lace our inhalers with chlorine gas. If we keep up this nonsense, in 10 years the once mighty armies of the US will succumb to depression, allergies or clinical exhaustion.